Archive for October, 2007

Radio Interview

October 29th, 2007 admin No comments

Having just arrived back from BBC Radio Manchester I needed to try and put my thoughts in order on this radio interview this morning.

In some senses it was both easier yet massively harder to be involved. There were two people joining in the debate on prostitution this morning. Julie Bindel from a London studio I think and Val McDermott who they called a guest editor/producer.

When I walked into the studio this morning apart from Eamonn and Dianne who host the morning breakfast show and whom I had met before, Val was also present. Unfortunately, this is where I am just a little bit mixed up! Initially when I first went into the studio I had thought I must have had the sex of the person wrong as I thought that Val was a woman but I went in to the studio I actually thought that Val must not be present as my eyes seemed to see a man. It took me time to realise that this was actually Val and that she was a woman and therein perhaps lies my concerns from this morning.

Learning to be a totally non-judgmental person is NOT easy. You can try as hard as you can not to put people into boxes but no matter what it still happens. This morning I really struggled not to feel that this person, and Julie Bindel in London were both feminists on a bandwagon of believing that their mission in life was to correct the injustices done to women who are forced into prostitution. However, I could not help but feel that whilst both Julie and Val had their feelings about this world very much at heart, they had I feel, lumped all us working girls into one big pot.

I know very well that prostituion is a hell of a world for many of the girls. They do see no way out to fund either their drug or alcohol habits but I think that what gets right up my nose is people from different walks of life believing that they know better than people who are actually in this world – we live it – they don’t. These free-thinking and obviously all-knowing (do forgive the sarcasm please) people apparently know how we should behave from the youngest child to the oldest adult and I certainly felt them ramming their judgements and views on the rest of the population. They apparently know what is right for each of us in society to do. They have the say in what others should do. This is the feeling I got from this morning but remember this is MY feeling not yours and certainly not theirs but as I keep trying to remind people, we are allowed to think and feel on our own and not have to put our lives into the way others think we should behave.

Julie Bindel wants to bring into the UK the zero tolerance approach that Sweden has. It means naming and shaming any man who chooses to “buy sex” although to be fair (I think!) she was talking at one stage about the specific activity of kerb crawling as this subject has just had a law passed about it in Scotland.

There are certain areas of prostitution that are badly handled and I would never stand in the way of anyone wanting to bring in laws to regulate this area. Anything that can mean that women, like me, are able to choose our own lives and stand up without fear of contempt is not something to be feared. People like Julie and Val though are trying to deal with the whole rather than looking at the small parts that together make up not quite the nasty picture that they feel prostitution is.

I hate that word you know … prostitution smacks of small mindedness … of men who believe that they can abuse others … of women who are smallminded about exactly what a prostitute is – there is no one word that sums up every one of us in this world. Being an escort IS different, I can choose and I do choose. We do have men who can try to put us down during their time with us but if women are educated in their choices then we can maintain that level of choice in whatever way we choose. Educating people to stand up for themselves and choose their own pathways is more a message to get across rather telling them that selling their bodies for money is wrong.

Bring in regulation definitely. Penalise kerb crawlers definitely, but don’t put down the women who are in this world by choice – it is OUR lives and some of us are able to be responsible adults who can make what choice we want in this world.

If anyone wants to listen to the radio interview its on the BBC Radio Manchester website. If you choose to listen again to the Eamonn and Dianne morning show (6am to 9am) for today (29 October) and go forward to an 8am starting point you will be able to listen to how it went this morning – judge for yourself but don’t ever try to judge my choices. I care about this world and I will continue to do so even when people like Val and Julie wish to put us all out of lives and show us the error of our ways. Good luck to them as I know I am proud to do what I do … its called caring in my world!

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