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Sue:What Makes Me Different?

March 19th, 2011 admin No comments

Had a phone call earlier this evening.  I was still at work.  Been spending hours and hours trying to get the workload up to date and am truly shattered but I feel that this weekend I can at least not worry as much as I have been doing, however, returning back to the fact that I had a phone call earlier this evening, the reason I have put pen to paper is because I thought that the conversation had finished with this person but then I had this rather direct question levelled at me … what makes you different?

A challenge – yeah!  Not the usual – who do you have know or what do you offer question – they always bring out the worst in my answers – usually along the lines of “you are not in touch with a pimp”!

So to answer my critics out there as to why I am different and am I really the same as I write in my diary – well you judge for yourself.  The easiest way is to call me and have a chat but if not, then the points below are defintely me, written in my own direct way and very definitely from my heart so …

  1. I care …. about who?  About people … money is and always has been secondary and whilst I have a breath in my body it will stay that way.  You will not find me escorting to make ends meet, I am not capable of using clients in that way or the girls that enjoy their time out within the Angels team
  2. My principles come from my upbringing as well as my heart and whilst my parents have refused to speak to me now for some 5 years (they wrote a truly nasty letter after I chose to make it clear what I wanted to do and why they called me a whore and a prostitute and unfortunately I let rip and called them appalling parents – the generation gap has a lot to answer for and the damage seems irreparable) it has not stopped me from knowing that earning money by using another person’s direct need for money is not something my conscience allows me to do and my principles have come from my parents always wanting me to stand on my own two feet and be thoughtful about what others think and feel
  3. I want to show professionalism in all I do – where I do not understand something I don’t sit there whingeing about no-one told me … I get up and find out and if I cannot find out, I find someone who does.  Finding a person whose role in life is to say “its not my job” is totally beyond me and perhaps that is why I am self-employed now - I am too controversial and outspoken these days yet my business clients love the passion I bring and the fully can-do attitude (I remember so many of my escort clients being so surprised at the way my passion for life and others comes across – they realised I loved what I did and they felt caring not just a service)
  4. I enjoy being in control and being able to fight the corner for the underdog but at the same time, I don’t like people who feel that I am their answer to their questions because they cannot be bothered to really research what it is they want to do and here I am mainly talking about girls who ask me to recommend reputable agencies when they don’t understand why they want to be in escorting in the first place

 The nice guy who asked me earlier this evening was so convinced he wanted to meet me – I don’t go out now.  You are going to be surprised to find that my social skills took a real nose dive when my husband left me over 5 years ago and now, whilst I am comfortable and well in control of anything that is not on a personal level, if you ask me to go for a meal or a drink and a chat, I still suffer a lot and will find a multitude of reasons to not go or to get out of it. 

The last real panic attack was over 19 months ago but I find it hard to risk putting myself in any situation that could give rise to my not feeling in control and you know where the real problem is – me!  Life and learning has given me too many reasons not to trust many people which is a truly sad way to find yourself at my age.  I keep thinking I would like to try dating again but at my age … yeah … well … don’t feel this is going to happen with ease because, as I said before, I don’t trust!

Am I different … nah!  Just the same as every one else yet to me, I know that if someone put me in a room with another agency owner I would feel wrong – I don’t feel I am the same as most owners out there.  I know what they do with their team, I have yet to hear of anyone who runs the agency with the heartfelt principles I have so whilst I can say to you I am just the same as everyone else … in the escort industry I feel different and to me, that is what counts.

Night xx

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